Can we just buy a TV already?

It's happened again.

Last time it was a new refrigerator. Back in 2005, our 6-year-old, contractor-grade refrigerator started leaking water from the freezer down to the fridge. So we did what any homeowner would do: we went to Home Depot, Lowes, RC Willey and Sears to look at fridges.

I thought I wanted one of those french door models with the freezer on the bottom. I ooed and awed over them trying to decide whether to get the white that matched our other contractor-grade appliances, or stainless which might match the appliances in the home we might move into someday. And was it worth it to play all that extra money for the french door fridge when I could get a side-by-side for a lot less. And none of them seemed to have all the features I wanted all together. I poured hours of Internet research into it on Consumer Reports, Good Housekeeping, and we asked everyone we knew what they would do.

At Sears, we met a nice young salesman named Hector. He showed us all the models and answered all our questions. We told him we needed to think about it some more. A few months later, we went back to Sears and talked to Hector again. The new models were coming out and didn't we want to buy one of the old models on clearance. Still needed to think about it and do more research. Came back in a few more months, and then again few months later, etc. Each time we left with a "let's think about it." It got to the point where Hector would see us and just start laughing because he knew we had more questions, but weren't really going to buy anything.

In May of 2007, Sears was having a great sale on appliances and we finally settled for a white side-by-side that had some of the features we wanted and was a lot less than the french door one I really wanted. We headed to Sears to finally buy that refrigerator only to find that Hector had the day off. We made a special trip back to Sears the next day so we could buy it from him. I bet Hector never had to work for 2 years to get a sale before or since.

Now, it's TV's. The main TV in our house is a 27" set we received as a hand me down from James' parents shortly after we were married. Since tomorrow is our 13th anniversary, that gives you some indication on its age. Needless to say, HDTV wasn't even a consideration back then. The tuner in the TV went out several years ago so we have to use the VCR's tuner to do anything (it's the entire reason we still have a VCR). Now the power switch doesn't always work.

About a year ago, when we started get inundated with all the HD-switch talk, we got all confused and thought we'd better go get a new TV right away. I think it was really a ploy by the electronics industry to make us believe we had to have a $2000 HDTV or we would be lepers. We learned that because we have cable, we really didn't have to do anything to be lepers. Whew.

Then we got a Wii and Mario Kart last Spring. For those of you who are Wiiophytes, when you play Mario Kart with 3 or more people, it divides the screen into four sections. On a 27" TV, you get what seems like a 2" square of screen to drive your kart down. So we have to get a bigger TV if we are going to play Mario Kart as a family. And isn't that why we bought a Wii in the first place?

So off to the Internet to do lots of research on Consumer Reports, CNet, and every other website imaginable. Do we get one that will fit in our entertainment center (very few 37" ones will) or do we go for broke and get the 47" and a new entertainment center. LCD or Plasma? 720 or 1080? What the heck is an HDMI and if our current TV has none, how many do we need? And if we get a new HDTV won't we have to get a blu-ray too?

And we harrassed lots of Hectors at lots of different stores. The HDTV guys at Costco probably think I am stalking them. Twice I have gone to buy a TV thinking I had my mind made up, only to either be talked out of by the sales guy or find it not available in the store.

I think we finally have it narrowed down to two choices: a 37" Toshiba that will fit into our entertainment center from Costco.com, or a 42" Vizio that won't fit but is available at our Costco. How we pick from the two could drive us crazy for another six months. And by then, a whole new batch of TV's will be out and we will have to start the process all over again.

I wonder if Hector sells TVs?

Days 10-12 and the BIG REVEAL

I am so sad to see this secret elf swap come to an end. I'm going to sound like a broken record here, but it's been so fun to have something to open everyday. The last week has been kind of rough around here with my boys (well, one of my boys in particular) and her gifts have made my day, everyday.

So to back track a bit. On Sunday, I had a bit of a dilemma because I had two gifts without day tags on them. And I really didn't want to open day 12's first because I didn't want to spoil the next few days. My Secret Elf found a way to let me know that this is the one I should open first:The wrapping was so cute I almost didn't want to open it. (I said almost. Of course I wanted to see what is inside.) And I wasn't disappointed when I found this:

Homemade Pumpkin Butter. I love all things pumpkin and can't wait to try this out. She included a recipe for a fruit dip that includes this. And the jar is wrapped so cute in Haiku paper too.

Then yesterday, I found this cute thing under my tree:

It's a lip balm holder including an Stampin' Up lip balm. These are really cute and I need to figure out how to make them so I can share it with my customers. And I love this striped paper. It was the first from that pack of paper to get all used up at my house. And the stamp (From this year's Ronald McDonald House set) should have been a clue as to who my elf was, but I didn't catch on. After all, we all got this stamp set at convention.

Then this morning, this cute box was sitting all lonely underneath my tree just crying to be opened:
A box made out of ski slope paper and wrapped up with that wonderful stitched chocolate ribbon and those cute felt flurries. Inside was this wonderful surprise:

A beautiful hand made card with this stamp set that I have always admired but never bought. It accompanied these yummy soaps direct from North Carolina. That means my secret elf is:


Angie!!!! (This picture is of Angie, me and Amy at convention). I got to know Angie at convention this summer. She quickly became one of my favorite people because it seemed like we have so much in common. We were both moms to one (at the time) who's sons have spent time too much time with doctors (although her son has spent way more time than my AJ). And as we talked, our views and experiences seemed very similar. I am lucky to count her among my friends. Thanks Angie for making this holiday season so much fun! Love ya!

And I have to say that I had no idea it was her. I guessed a few different people at different times, but never Angie.

Now almost as fun as opening my gift has been seeing what my elfette has said about her little gifts. Want to see what I made for my elfette? Check out Lisa's blog. I had so much fun being Lisa's elf too. Love ya Lisa!

Days 7, 8 & 9

I hope my secret elf knows how much I have loved getting a little something everyday. Even if I haven't been the best at posting my bounty every day, I do love everything and it has really made my day to open a gift. Here is what I received the past three days:


On Thursday, the box of really yummy smelling candles. And Jen from New Hampshire reminded me that candles aren't for hoarding, they are for burning. I was shocked to hear that. You mean, people actually burn candles and don't just leave them in the box smelling all nice and pretty?!?!? Oh boy, where have I been.

Yesterday, we had a very rough morning. When I was in the middle of my total meltdown, I remembered that I hadn't opened my elf gift yet. Whew. Made my whole morning better to find this really cute mug with candies in it. It even has that gorgeous striped Stampin' Up! ribbon on it. (Which I am hoarding an entire, unopened roll of if you must know.) It says, "Dear God, do you hear every note?" I hope not, since I haven't been to choir practice all season and will be singing with the impromptu choir tomorrow at church.

And today, I found this cute snowman under my tree. I love snowman. And this one is just adorable. Thank you elf! You are the best!

I should also mention that I finished off the tin of shortbread cookies I opened last weekend yesterday. I think those were the best non-homemade shortbread cookies I've ever had. Yummo!

Better Days

I love all kinds of Christmas music. I love the traditional Christmas hymns we sing in church this time of year, "Silent Night," "Away in a Manger," and "Joy to the World." I love the crooners singing "White Christmas" and "Chestnuts Roasting on an open fire." It just isn't Christmas for me until I here the Carpenters sing "Merry Christmas Darling," Wham sing "Last Christmas" and Band Aid sing "Do They Know It's Christmas Time."

But the last few years, a new favorite as emerged: The Goo Goo Doll's "Better Days." Here are just a few of the lyrics:

"And you ask me what I want this year
And I try to make this kind and clear
Just a chance that maybe we'll find better days
Cuz I don't need boxes wrapped in strings
And desire and love and empty things
Just a chance that maybe we'll find better days

So take these words
And sing out loud
Cuz everyone is forgiven now
Cuz tonight's the night the world begins again."

2008 has been a rough year for so many people I care so much about. In my family, we've had deaths, a cancer diagnosis, a heart attack, major surgery, failed classes, tough economic times, struggles with our children, etc, etc. Among my friends, more deaths of loved ones, more cancer, more health troubles, financial troubles, marital troubles, etc.

Every time I hear this song, I think of all of these people, all of you. What better wish could I offer any of you than the chance that maybe we'll find better days. (I know I could use a whole lot of better days.)

So that is my holiday wish for all of you: may 2009 be full of better days for all of us.

Secret Elf Day 5 & 6

Yesterday turned into a crazy day with absolutely crazy children. I think copious amounts of counseling are in order for me and for them. Not sure how we are going to survive two weeks of no school. But when the new year comes, we'll have Spencer in preschool too and that should help both of them.

I have two more wonderful elf gifts to share. Yesterday was day 5 and I opened this really cute picture frame. I initially was going to put a picture of my three BFF's and me in it, but it seemed way more fitting to put a picture of my Swapper Anon friends from convention in it. This will have a place of honor in my stamping room to remind me always of these amazing ladies who provide me so much inspiration both creatively and personally.


Today is day six. This cute gift box got a little smashed en route, but it is so cute. I love that taffeta ribbon. And inside I found this really cute post it note holder and matching pen in the very lovely Parisian Summer paper. (Love this paper too. I have a whole pack that I am hoarding.) THANK YOU ELF!!! I love everything.

I can't believe we are half way through our swap. We are already talking about another one like this since we are having so much fun this time around. You better believe I will be signing right up for that!

Secret Elf Days 2, 3 & 4

We had a busy weekend with the Butlers coming for a visit. It was lots of fun to have the kids together and Clara and Spencer get a long as well as Brynn and A.J. It's so fun to think about how long we've been friends (17 years) and how far we've come during that time. They are family to us and our kids see their kids more often than they see their own cousins.

But in all the fun, I didn't get my elf gifts posted. I really didn't finish the explanation the other day. So there's this group of people who like to swap and support each other through all of life's ups and downs. In October, one of our group, Jen, suggested we do this 12 Days of Christmas Secret Elf swap. I almost didn't sign up because it was about the time that Spencer came to our family and I was taking things off my to do list and not adding new things.

But I am so glad that I did join in the merriment. It has been so fun to have a little something to open everyday and my kids are just as excited as I am. And it's been a blast to hear about all the other Secret Elf gifts that others in the group are getting. One of the highlights is hearing my elfie post about what she is receiving too. I hope she is having as much fun as I am.

On Saturday, I opened a tin of shortbread cookies. Yummy! On Sunday, there was this cute dish towel with a flower on it and the Stampin' Up's Statement of the Heart on the belly band. Today, there is a wonderful book called "Everyday Encouragement." (And boy do I need a little encouragement everyday so this will be great!) A BIG THANK YOU to my elf for making my holiday season so much fun!

The 12 Elf Gifts for Christmas - Day 1

On the first day of Christmas, my secret elf gave to me:


The cutest thing I've ever seen! I *heart* Dashing Paper (from last year's Stampin' Up catalog) and these tags are so cute. The little binder is a bitty book and it stores the tags. Do you think they are too cute to use? Thank you secret elf friend who ever you are!

I guess I should explain for the rest of you. I belong to an *exclusive* group ;) of Stampin' Up! Demonstrators on Splitcoast Stampers: Swappers Anon. We started together last spring before convention and kept each other going when we all over committed for swaps. Now we keep each other going through life's ups and downs, as well as exchange business ideas, enable purchases (you all know who I am talking about) and of course, swap. They come up with the best projects and I am never disappointed when I get a package of swaps back from them. They are all very talented.

I love these ladies and I am blessed to have them a part of my life just about everyday. I can't wait to see what the next 11 days bring. Keep checking back and I will keep sharing these wonderful treats!

Believe

Yesterday morning was our ward Christmas party. This year's theme was "Believe" and was based on the Christmas book and movie "The Polar Express." My neighbor Jen is the activity chair and since I drag her along on a lot of my adventures, I went a long for a ride on this one with her. Whatever she needed, I tried to help as best I could.

A lot of people come out of the woodwork for these things and there were more people than expected. A food shortage quickly became apparent and several of us started scrambling to figure out how to feed a few more people (and more than just eggs). I found my friend Teri and asked if Spencer could sit with her while I ran home to get some more sausage.

In the mean time, the Polar Express arrived at the North Pole and Santa appeared. While I was in the kitchen cooking sausage, Spencer came in to show me the new trinket he received from Santa. I couldn't believe I had missed it. My new son's first visit with Santa and I missed it. I heard from several people that he was really cute and answered all of Santa's questions and called him, "Ho, Ho, Ho." It is one of those moments you'll just never get back.

A felt a little bad about it, but when A.J. went up to see Santa, I brought Spencer a long too so I could get a picture of the two of them together on Santa's lap. Here is the result:


A member of our bishopric, Ron Stagg, wrote this little message that was put on the tables about believing that really sums up what Christmas is all about:

"At Christmas time there are many things to believe in. We believe in family, in traditions, in gifts, in yummy food, and even in Santa Claus, but our true beliefs must be anchored in our faith in Christ. This is the true reason for Christmas: to celebrate, to remember and to believe in the miracle of Jesus Christ.

Believe in the prophecies that foretold His life.

Believe in the marvelous events surrounding His birth.

Believe in the countless miracles He performed.

Believe in the truthfulness of His teachings.

Believe in the life that He willingly surrendered.

Believe in the salvation that He gives.

Believe. . ."

It's Really Not Looking Like Christmas - yet

Here we are, the 6th of December and I am having a hard time getting that Christmas feeling. The tree is up. I've been listening to Christmas music non stop for the last week. I've been to two Christmas parties. Lots of shopping is done. My secret elf gifts are done and en route. Still not feeling that Christmas spirit yet.

Why, you ask? This afternoon when I came home, A.J. was playing outside. He was wearing shorts and a tee shirt and no shoes. It is December 6. In Utah. What the heck? I did make him put on his shoes and he added a jacket. But the jacket wasn't totally necessary. His friends didn't have them on.
I am not complaining really. As a California girl at heart, I can live without the traditional cold and snow that come with winter in the salt shaker. But after living here for 15 years, I just can't get into that Christmas feeling without it.

Never fear though, Monday it is suppose to snow. And by time I pick A.J. et al up from school, I will be cursing the white stuff. But at least it will feel more like Christmas.

Giving Thanks

I love Thanksgiving. I love turkey and mashed potatoes and stuffing and green bean casserole and pumpkin pie and hot fresh rolls and I could go on all day.

But I love Thanksgiving for a lot of other reasons too. It's the one holiday that is just about the things that really matter: family, friends and giving thanks to God for our bounty. Thanksgiving has escaped a lot of the commercialism that has crept into Christmas and Easter and all the other great holidays and detracted from their true meaning.

I have so much to be thankful for this year. I have been richly blessed in so many ways, big and small.

-My three handsome, wonderful, charming guys: James, A.J. and Spencer. They make my life very interesting, keep me on my toes and I wouldn't trade them for the world.

-The gift of adoption without which, I wouldn't have my two boys. My heart is full of thanks for them and for everyone who made it possible for them to be in our forever family.

-The rest of my family. My brothers and their families, parents, in laws, aunts, uncles and cousins and for the amazing grandparents that went before us too.

-This free country where I can vote, go to the church I choose and say whatever I want. And for the men and women who have sacrificed so I can have those freedoms.

-The knowledge that I am a child of God and that he loves me and wants what is best for me and my family. And to know that he hears and answers prayers.

-My many varied and wonderful friends. I am very lucky to have so much friendship and support in my life. I would be lost with out it.

-That we have a home to live in, cars to drive, clothes to wear, food to eat, toys to play with, heat in the winter and A.C. in the summer and no one is threatening to take them away. In these tough economic times, so many people can't say the same thing. We are blessed.

-Technology. I'm an internet junkie. I love blogs, Splitcoast, on line shopping and now facebook. I love how easy it makes it to keep in touch with my friends and family.

-Creativity. Elder Uchtdorf at the last general women's broadcast said it is one of the keys to happiness. For me, it is a big one. I am happy when I create, and I slip into the doldrums when I don't.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Me?!?!? On Facebook?!?!?

Last Spring, my childhood friend Linda Valentine sent me an invite to join Facebook. I just didn't want to go there. After all, part of James' job is to find people using social networking sites for illegal purposes and I did some work for an internet safety group a few years back. Those sites are evil, right?

Well, this last week, I got two more invites from people I know. So I decided to check it out and see what it is all about.

If you know me, you know that I don't just do something, I do it big. I started by accepting the invites I already had and then I went to town finding people from my past and present.

And people have found me. My prom date, Mark Davidson, found me yesterday. Not even sure how that happened because I don't know enough about the site yet. But it was fun to reminisce about the past and reconnect with an old friend.

Here is the strange thing to me: I have always lived my life in a very compartmentalized fashion. When I was a child and a teenager, I had school friends and church friends. I didn't mix them up much and I actually acted quite differently around them. At school I was a quiet, studious, a band geek and a "GATE" kid (another word for nerd.) At church, I was loud, fun and the life of the party.

I've kind of carried that on to today. I have friends from work, friends from college, friends that I've kept close to from my growing up years. I have friends from my neighborhood and church now, and friends from our old apartment days. And I have my SCS stamping friends. (I used to call them my virtual friends but I actually met most of them at convention last summer so they are virtual to me no more.)

Occasionally over the years, there was overlap among these groups, but in general, they all fit nicely in their own little compartments. I kind of liked that because I could share what parts or me I wanted with each group.

On Facebook, there is no compartmentalizing. (Or at least if there is I haven't figured it out yet.) My old high school classmates are right there with my old church friends, my new stamping friends, current church friends (including my Bishop), my family, work friends and an assortment of other people I have known through the years. It is a strange concept for me and I am still trying to figure out if I am OK with that.

I must be because I keep going back for more. I am having fun and feeling very nostalgic about the whole thing. One of the girls I went to school with posted these pictures her grandmother saved from the newspaper of various events. There was a picture of me the one and only time I ever got straight A's. It was one of my awkward phases but here it is:
Too funny! I even got in on the fun an uploaded some of my own photos from MJHS and AHS. Now do I find photos of the rest of my friends and post those too?

New Look!

I've been meaning to go out there and find a cute template for my blog but the one time I tried, it turned into a disaster.

My friend Brodi just started a blog with a great background and my SCS friends Kathy and Amy just updated the look of their blogs and they are so cute. It was time for me to figure it out.

I found this one with Paisleys! Any one who has known me for a long time knows I love paisleys. And I thought this looked a little Christmasy without just being a holiday look. And it was so easy!

Polar Opposites

It's been three weeks and counting since Spencer became part of our family. We still have our good and bad moments but it's a bit less sticky around here. The hardest part right now is that he wants to be around me all the time. If I go downstairs, he follows. If I go upstairs, he follows. If I leave without him, he cries. He wants me to be the one to feed him, change him, play with him, rock him to sleep, etc, etc. It's a bit exhausting and overwhelming at times, but it's an honor to be wanted too.

I know as a mom we aren't suppose to compare our children to each other, but the differences between A.J. in Spencer are so stark, it amazes me. For instance:

- A.J. is right-handed. Spencer is left-handed. The funny thing about that fact was I didn't even notice until we went to the doctor and she asked him to draw a circle for her. He picked the pen up with his left hand and she commented on it. Great, a stranger spends five minutes with my son and notice something about him that I hadn't after a week of living with him.

-A.J. loves to watch TV. Spencer doesn't. A.J. can be a little couch potato. Turn the TV on and he will watch it for hours and still complain when you turn it off. So far, Spencer doesn't care if it's on or off and if it happens to be on, he might watch it for a minute but then he is on to something else. That's good because TV isn't the best for you, but it's bad because it doesn't entertain and distract him so I can get something else done.

-Spencer loves toys. A.J. is mildly entertained by them, sometimes. Spencer can play with the same toy for a long time. He drives a car or a train around and around. He can build Mr. Potato Head over and over again. Or play with duplos forever. Toys have just never held A.J.'s attention for any length of time. He would play with one for a few minutes maybe and then is on to something else (likely TV).

-Spencer is a good eater. A.J. is picky (like me). Spencer will try anything and loves fruits and vegetables. His appetite isn't huge but there isn't much he doesn't eat. A.J. takes after me and has a discriminating palate. Apple Sauce and carrots (with Ranch) are about his extent of fruits and veggies. I know that is probably my fault for not exposing him to more at a younger age.

-A.J. is very verbal. Spencer, not so much. A.J. spoke very early and has talked like a little adult since he was a toddler. Spencer is speech-delayed and hard to understand. We are getting better about figuring out his words, but we need to work with him some more and get him caught up.

- Spencer is agile and fast. A.J., not so much. Spencer is a fire ball of energy. He can outrun us all and can turn on a dime. A.J. is good at running and jumping and all of that, but tends to take after me in the klutzy department. I think part of that is A.J.'s ear issues and the fact that he grows so fast that his coordination can't keep up. I'm sure that will change as he gets older. I think Spencer will be a good soccer player or sprinter.

-Spencer is in the fifth percentile for height. A.J. is in the 97th percentile. Just by looking at them, people are constantly amazed that Spencer is three and even more amazed that A.J. is five.

- Spencer loves to be a big helper boy. A.J., not so much. Spencer generally will pick up his toys, help cook dinner or any other chore I am trying to accomplish. A.J. is happy to just let you do it for him, or whine and complain the whole time he is doing it.

I think all these things have helped me recognize that they are individual people with different likes, dislikes, strengths and weaknesses that make them who they are and love them even more for them. Now if we could just get a bit of the good for both of them to rub off on the other, we'd be golden!

Dotting the "i"s and crossing the "t"s

This morning, Spencer's legal father relinquished his parental rights to LDS Family Services. That was the last hurdle we needed to make Spencer officially part of our family. It is a huge relief to have that behind us. It wasn't that he didn't want to sign, it was just getting his caseworker to call our caseworker back. James made a strategically placed call yesterday to someone he knows and, viola, we it's done.

We also found out that there was a Child Protect Services hearing yesterday and the judge, attorneys and caseworkers were all supportive of his placement with us. Not that there was much they could do at this point, but glad to have that behind us as well.

Now if we could just get the insurance company to add him to our policy, the world would be as close to perfect as we need right now.

On a whole, this week is going much better than last. Instead of molasses, it feels more like maple syrup. Still sticky, but the progress is coming a bit faster. A few less temper tantrums and a few more smiles and hugs. And just like A.J., Spencer's smile can light up this whole place.

Tomorrow, we are going to take him for a check up and medical evaluation at our clinic. It will be nice to get a doctor's opinion about his medications, development issues, etc. Next week we start counseling with him.

And tomorrow, we are also going to get new family pictures taken. A few times in the last week, Spencer has looked at our wall and pointed to our family pictures. I want him to know we think of him as part of our family when he looks at those pictures, even if he is not quite ready to do so himself.

A new day for America

Like a lot of people, I am relieved that the elections are finally over. It's been a long two years full of twists and turns. I look forward to the top stories of the news being anything but who said what about the other.

Sixteen years ago, I was very involved in the election cycle. As president of the College Republicans in one of the most conservative counties in America, I had a hard time picturing that the world could go on when my candidate lost. There were so many dire predictions about what would happen to this great country because it had been turned over the Bill Clinton and his crowd.

Not that I ever became a fan of Bill Clinton, but somehow our country survived eight years of him. We've also survived eight years of George W. Bush. One of the great things about America is that the political parties really agree on the big picture: a free and united country.

It is not like we are choosing between communism and democracy when we vote. We are choosing between two slightly different versions of the same government. OK, maybe a bit more than "slightly" but if you look at our parties in the scheme of the world, the major differences tend to be social issues that, while very important to a lot of people, aren't nearly as important as the right to vote, assemble, worship as we please and say what we feel without fear.

The founders also set up a government system with checks and balances. One person cannot have all the power and all the say so. And while one party is in control right now, history tells us that will change in the next few years. The American people tend to balance out the power between the parties every few years.

This year, my candidate didn't survive the primaries. I found myself a bit conflicted about the final election. Should I vote for the guy who fought against funding for Salt Lake's Olympic security plan? Should I vote for the guy who looks like my sons? Should I vote for the guy I would most like to sit down and have a conversation with? Should I vote for the person that I thought could be the best leader? Should I vote for the guy that most closely matched my views? Even my sons were divided on the issue with A.J. rooting for McCain because he reminds him of his grumpy grandpa (his words not mine) and Spencer who said "Rock Bama" when I asked him who he wanted for president.

By yesterday, I decided regardless of the outcome I would be excited. Either we would have the first woman vice president, or the first African American president. How amazing is that? And how exciting that so many people felt like they had a voice in this election and actually went to the polls. How can you argue with that. Democracy at work.

And when I heard President-elect Obama's speech last night, I was almost over come with emotion. He said the things that our country needed to hear. He seemed very presidential. His ability to unite our country will be tested in the next several months but I believe it will happen.

And on a very personal level, I love what it means for my boys. As a mom, I want the very best for them and I want them to grow up thinking they can be anything they want to be without any limits. Barack Obama proved that is true for them and for all people who look a different than our founding fathers. This morning I told A.J. that Obama's win means that he can be anything he wants, even president of the United States someday. His response, "I'll get to be the boss!"

It is a new day for America and I can't help but feel optimistic some how. I know there are still tough days ahead with the economy and the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan but I believe America is a great country and will overcome the challenges before us. And even if they other guy had won, we still would have.

Brothers

The adjustment to having a new brother has been rough on A.J. and Spencer. But we have caught them in a few tender moments this week.

Here's A.J. pushing Spencer on the swing:

Here's James, A.J. and Spencer carving pumpkins on Halloween:


And here's our little trick or treaters ready for action:

Keep your hands inside the ride at all times. . . .

This week has been quite the roller coaster. There have been wonderful, tender moments when I think we are just so lucky and blessed. Then we have those moments where I wonder in the heck we've done to our family and will we ever have "normal" again.

Spencer is so full of ups and downs. He can be such a cute, fun kid one moment and hitting, scratching and screaming "NO!" the next. I know he is just going through regular adjustment phases, but it sure wears me out. He is testing the boundaries and trying to figure out how he fits into this crazy home full of weird strangers.

But we've come a long way in a week too. When we took him to Carl and Meg's for dinner last Sunday. He sat on the floor the whole time by himself playing with a truck and blocks and wouldn't eat a thing (until the carrot cake came out and that only lasted until he found a raisin in it.)

Today we went to see my cousin Andy bless his new baby and to a family dinner afterward. Spencer played with the other kids and actually ate quite a bit. Progress. Slow and steady. But progress.

I've compared it to swimming in molasses. We're making lots of motions, but hardly moving at forward at all. I think that is how it is going to be for awhile. Meanwhile, I am just trying to breathe in and out and put one foot in front of the other.

And I keep reminding myself of something Elder M Russell Ballard said at General Conference in April, "The joy of motherhood comes in moments." Motherhood isn't all happy, all the time, but there are those little moments that bring you joy. We are hoping in the near future there are more moments of joy and less moments of tears.

Welcome Spencer - the Bitter and the Sweet

We got the call at 2:30 p.m. yesterday afternoon that we could pick up Spencer at 5:30 p.m. and sign paperwork and bring him home to our family. Wow! It was really going to happen. It would be a legal-risk placement but actually less of a risk than we took with A.J.

We arrived promptly at 5:30 p.m. but Spencer and his mom were running late, stuck in traffic. We went ahead and paid our placement fee and waited. It was about 45 minutes later when they arrived.

Five years ago, it was hard to watch A.J.'s birthmom say goodbye to him. But I couldn't even imagine how hard it was for her because I was pretty naive in those days about a mother's love.

Last night, it was excruciating to watch Spencer's mom say goodbye to him. I can't even think about it without crying again. She held him close and kept whispering, "I love you. I love you." My heart just shattered right there for both of them. What a brave, strong woman.

Once his mom left the room, he totally broke down. "Mommy. Mommy," he cried over and over again. My heart broke all over again. There was no consolling him, or me at that point. We just cried together. That was the bitter.

I signed my portion of the paperwork through tears and James was the strong one, thank goodness one of us could be.

Once that was done, I asked Spencer if he wanted to go home and play with the trains. He stopped crying, got in the car and we came home.

I had all the images in my mind of pictures at the agency and going out to dinner to celebrate. By time we finished it all, it was about 7:20 and we were in no shape to take pictures or to go out to dinner. We just came home.

Spencer did pretty well once we got here. He played trains with James and A.J. while I fixed dinner. He didn't each much dinner but that was OK. He took his night time medicine, but an hour later was still just as wound up so we gave him the rest of his dose.

We read for awhile and then it was time for sleep. Spencer cried for mom again but he let me hold him and sing to him this time and he went ot sleep pretty quick. That was the sweet.

He only woke up once at about 12:30 this morning and I got up with him, rocked him back to sleep and then decided to sleep on a mat on his floor in case it kept happening. Needless to say, I didn't sleep well and woke up with a stiff back this morning.

He woke up hungry and ready to eat a good breakfast. Apple sauce, yogurt and oatmeal. Not bad for a boy I've hardly seen eat anything. Here's A.J. and Spencer eating breakfast:

We've had a pretty good day so far. We went to Costco for a few more things, had lunch, took A.J. to school. All the usual things. We'll have to see how haircuts go this afternoon.

We did manage to get a family picture this morning, even on the first try:


There was a Child Services hearing this morning about Spencer and his siblings. They were hoping to get a relinquishment from the legal father at the hearing and it didn't happen. Because they scheduled the hearing on such short notice, it was a new judge and new attorney's involved. In the first bit of wisdom I've seen from the state in this case, the judge rescheduled the hearing for a time when the original judge who is familiar with the case could hear it. So we are back to hoping they can get relinquishment from the legal father before then. I guess he told today's judge that he was ready to sign and the attorney representing him asked for that to be struck from the record. Oh bother!

I am sure there is more to say, but I am still physically and emotionally tired from last night. Watch for more about Spencer and A.J. soon.

Spencer meets Geo Trax

Adopting a three year old is so different from adopting a new born. When we adopted A.J., we met his birthmom before he was born once, and then we picked him up when he was two days old and that was that. Well, not really because we had that whole issue with his birthfather later. But really, the adjustment was much like what every first time parent goes through and A.J. doesn't remember anything, except being apart of our family.

This time, we are trying to bring a child into our family who already has a mom and a dad. He has a sister and a brother who he lives with now. I can't even imagine what he must think about what is going on right now. He doesn't talk much. Mostly just nods. So all we can do, is read his body language. But we are trying to make the transition as smooth as possible.

This afternoon, we brought him over to our home to get to know us better for a few hours. In the car on the way to our house, even with a movie on in the car, he seemed completely freaked out by what was happening. But he walked right in the door, took one look at the Geo Trax and went right to work. Pretty soon, James had built him quite a track to make all the trains go round and round.


A.J. brought over Addison to meet him too. Then he told Jen (Addison's mom), "Allow me to introduce you to my brother." So Jen and Keaton came over too. Again, Spencer's little face showed he was a bit freaked out. A new surrounding and so many new people. We put the bounce house up outside but all Spencer wanted to do was play Geo Trax. Thank goodness for Geo Trax.

A.J. played some too. Here they are together:

They look like good brother huh? Even if A.J. dwarfs Spencer in size.

We had dinner but Spencer didn't eat much. I guess the medication he is on doesn't leave him much of an appetite. After dinner, he went right back to playing Geo Trax. More neighbors stopped by and soon we had a house full again, and everyone, young and old was playing Geo Trax. Spencer just kind of sat there, trying to take it all in but a little scared about all the new people.

We took him back to his current home and he was soon back to his old self. Running around and playing with his brother and sister there. A.J. even joined in with the running around and playing for a few minutes.

As with A.J.'s adoption, things aren't going so smoothly on the legal side right now. For two weeks, LDS Family Services has been trying to get a reliquishment from Spencer's legal father. So far, it hasn't happened. Because he is in prison, they have to work with a Correction's social worker to arrange a time for him to sign. So far they've had little luck getting Corrections to even call them back. So placement will not happen this weekend like we had planned.

At first I was really disappointed because it's what we had planned. But now I think it will be nice to give Spencer a few more days to transition. We will see him tomorrow when we go to Barnyard Boo at Thanksgiving Point with his current extended family. Then on Sunday, we will bring him over here for a few hours before we take him to meet some cousins and an Aunt and Uncle. It gives us time to get his room finished and all ready for him. It's all cleaned out, but there is no furniture in it yet. Just toys and his name on the wall, thanks to Jen who made a name swag for him.

The other major challenge to this adoption is Child Protective Services. Because a negligance complaint was filed on his current mother, the state is going to hold a hearing on Tuesday and possibly place Spencer and his siblings in supervised custody. If that happens, she can't place Spencer for adoption through a private agency. We are hoping for an end run that will make it possible for us to have him in our family by then. Right now we are left with convincing everyone to do a legal risk placement on Monday or hoping they can get a relinquishment from the legal father before the hearing on Tuesday.

The hero of the story is the lead adoption worker at our LDS Family Services office, Lorna and her fellow caseworkers who are working on this case. When Spencer's mother came through the door, Lorna immediately thought of our family for him. When her boss was ready to through in the towel and conceed to the State, she convinced her the fight wasn't over. She told us tonight that she feels strongly that this placement needs to take place for Spencer's sake and for ours.

We're just praying she is right and leaving it in God's hands. To be continued, I'm sure. . .

Introducing Spencer

Two weeks ago today, we got a call from the head caseworker at our LDS Family Services office. She was wondering if we would be open to consider an unusual adoption situation. An adoptive mother was looking to place a three-year old with some special needs. She had narrowed it down to three profiles, including ours. Would we be interested?

I hung up the phone and called James and ran it by him. Of course, he thought of dozens of questions I hadn't even thought of. But James is very skeptical of these situations. I knew when he didn't rule it out in the first five minutes, that this could really happen.

We took the night to think about it and called the caseworker back the next day and grilled her for more information, like his name: Spencer. My final question to her was if there were still two other families being considered. Well, no. One withdrew themselves because they have a pending adoption. Between the other two families, she preferred ours. The adoptive mom had also shown the profiles to her father and to her best friend. They both picked ours. I asked to see a picture and she told me to come get it. This is what I got:


Cute, huh? At this point we were overwhelmed and wondering what we were really getting ourselves into. Could we welcome him into our family and give him the structure, love and home that he needs? Would I be able to keep up with a boy already being treated for ADHD?

After a day of fasting and prayer, we agreed to meet him on that Friday. What can I say? James and I fell in love with him right away. He warmed right up to us and loved the truck we brought as a little present. His engaging smile sucked me right in. Our Spencer.

That night we told A.J. he would be getting a new brother. He told Addison and McKenna (our neighbors) that he wouldn't be able to play as much with them because he would be playing with his new brother.

Then we left for vacation. I woke up from a nap on Sunday afternoon at the hotel and looked around with a distinct feeling that someone was missing. Spencer.

Today, I took A.J. to meet him. Holy cow are we in for some crazy days ahead. Spencer was showing off for A.J. and they were running around together throwing things and having a grand old time. Spencer was a bit rough with him, but A.J. was a great big brother and didn't get rough back. When Spencer ran off, A.J. went after him and brought him back. They were even holding hands.

Spencer reminds me a lot of A.J. at three and a half. He puts everything in his mouth. He likes to run away. Get into everything. Gets aggressive when he doesn't get his way. Maybe all three-year old boys are like that? Or maybe I just got two from the same mold.

But Spencer is speech delayed and isn't potty trained yet. So we have some fun days ahead. I am going to have to step up my game a bit and be a better mom. Lots of structure from day one and lots of love. And I've got to get the house child-proof again. We used to joke that there was child-proof and there was A.J.-proof. I fear that Spencer-proof might be an entirely new level of security.

On Friday we get to bring him over to play for a couple of hours and if things go well, we will bring him home for good on Saturday after we meet all of his current family.

Spencer is not the name we had picked out for a boy. Our good friends named their son Spencer earlier this year and I am pretty sure we would not purposely use the same name. But it fits him and it was his birthmother's last name. So even though we have the option to change it, Spencer it will be.

With A.J. I had lots of promptings along the way that let me know that he was coming. I was talking to my friend Leigh about this a few weeks ago. She is also an adoption worker and an adoptive mother. She asked if I had any feelings about the next one. I told her that I had in the past, but nothing that made any sense. About three years ago, I had a feeling that my child had already been born and that we wouldn't be getting a newborn. When nothing came of it, I figured that I had been wrong. Now it makes sense. God prepares us in many ways and sometimes it doesn't make sense right away. It's one of those lessons I apparently have to learn over and over again in my life.

My friend Angie said the other day something that has really stuck out to me: "If God leads you to it, he will lead you through it." I am going to cut that out of vinyl and put it on my wall some where were I can see it every day.

Home At Last!

This morning we returned from our eight day adventure to Southern California. We are exhausted and I have quite the sun rash on my arms, but I even got James to admit he had fun today. The next several posts are the highlights of each of our stops along the way.

We started out our trip, flying to Orange County on Saturday, October 11. We arrived at about 9:30 in the morning and headed straight for Disneyland. We will never do that again. Combine the stress of last week (more about that in a future post) with the stress of packing and the stress of getting up early and getting to the airport and we were all too tired to really enjoy our day.

We spent most of Saturday at California Adventure riding the various rides there. We LOVE Soarin' over California! It is the best ride ever. I was sitting next to some ladies that had never been on it before. That's the best because they really started ooing and awing over everything. A.J. really wanted to catch the golf ball, but didn't. (Of course, it's just a movie so there is no golf ball.) We also decided to stand in line for Toy Story Mania. It's also a great ride. It's kind of like Astroblasters where you are shooting things, but the games change everytime you move. And it's 3D. Worth the wait for sure! We did make it over to Disneyland and went on the Jungle Cruise and Pirates. But we were too tired to do anything else and went back to the hotel. We heard the fireworks going off, but were too tired to even go look and see if we could see anything.

Sunday we had early entry and took full advantage. Because we stayed at the Disneyland Hotel, we even got to ride the Monorail. A.J. discovered his favorite ride at Disneyland is the Matterhorn. We spent the day getting on all the rides we could before the lines got too long. By that evening, the crowds were so big and we were so tired that we sat on a bench near the castle and waited two hours for the firework show. We also bought A.J. a Mickey Mouse Light Saber that he just loves. He played with it for those two hours while we waited for the fireworks and kept the family next to us pretty entertained. This is my fourth time at Disneyland with the same firework show, but it is AMAZING so it's well worth it.


Monday was so windy. The Santa Ana's were blowing hard and shut down a bunch of rides at both parks. When the park opened, we rushed over to ride Finding Nemo. If you've been to the park in the last year, you know that this ride routinely has a 60 minute wait even just a few minutes after the park opens. We were in the first group that got on submarines and it was still 30 minutes before we got on the subs and went for the ride. I'll never wait for it again, but it is a cute ride.

It was really fun to be there in October when the park was all decked out for Halloween. The Haunted Mansion is transformed into the Nightmare before Christmas this time of year and it is very cleverly done. I am glad we rented it and let A.J. watch it a few times so he understood what was going on. They also have Woody's Halloween Roundup going. Over all, it was a great time to go. Although maybe not on the weekend because of the crowds and the weather could have been a bit better.

But I got my churro and my Dole whip so all is good. That is why I go to Disneyland ya know.

It was also our first time staying on property. The Disenyland Hotel was conveinent but you are really paying for the location, not the rooms. They were just fine, but nothing too spectacular. But it was really cool when Chip was standing over by the elevator one morning.I also forgot to mention that we finally saw the prize patrol, not once but twice. This is my fourth trip to the park since they started the prize patrol thing and I've never seen them before. This time we saw them twice. Once when we were leaving the hotel the first day and again the last day in Downtown Disney. We got a "Year of a Million Dreams" lanyard and pins and also a "Year of a Million Dreams" mouse ears. Not too shabby.

Read on to hear about the rest of our vacation. I'll post more about our other big news tomorrow.

Moving Day

Tuesday was moving day. We spent the morning at Downtown Disney eating breakfast at the Rain Forest Cafe and blowing a wad at World of Disney.

Then we waved goodbye to Mickey and headed south the San Diego. We thought we left late enough to miss traffic but we didn't account for an accident in San Clemente that shut down I-5 or for a fire on Camp Pendleton that might as well have shut the freeway down. A.J. got car sick on the way down and we had to make another unscheduled stop to take care of that.

Our first stop in San Diego was Old Town. James and I discovered the Old Town Mexican Cantina on our first trip to San Diego and have been back each time we've gone. They have fresh homemade tortillas that you can watch being made right in the front window. The only problem, somewhere in the last ten years, they decided they need to put cilantro in everything. Who came up with that idea anyway?

Then we checked in at the Bahia Resort. The resort is a bit on the old side, but we were extremely pleased with the size of the room and the location. I would stay there again. They have their own private beach on Mission Bay and it is just a short walk to Mission Beach as well.

That evening, A.J. and I walked to Mission Beach to watch the sun set. It was so beautiful. It ended up being the only time we spent on the beach. A.J. enjoyed putting his feet in the water and I enjoyed watching him and watching the sun slip behind the Pacific Ocean. Here are some pictures:

Shamu! Shamu!

Wednesday meant Sea World. James and I went to Sea World years ago and didn't really enjoy it. Let me just say, it is sooooooo much better with a kid in tow. Even though he was whiny and told us he wasn't going to have any fun.

James favorite show was the Dolphins but A.J. and I loved the Shamu show, Believe. Even though we sat in the "Wet zone" and didn't get a drop of water on us, it was spectacular.

There are only three "adult" rides at Sea World. Wild Arctic is a helicopter simulator ride that is kind of like a weak version of Star Tours. I got a bit sick, but not too bad. We got drenched on Shipwreck rapids (just fine since it was very warm that day). Then there is Journey to Atlantis. I don't even know how to explain it except that I read it is Splash Mountain meets the Matterhorn. Very different ride. Lots of fun and pretty wet. Here's A.J. and I on it:

They also have a new area with a Sesame Street theme with some kiddie rides and a big play area. And of course, a character greeting area where we got to give Burt, Ernie and Cookie a big hug!
All in all, a fun day. We will be going back to Sea World again someday, but not too soon.

Lions and Tigers and Bears, Oh My!

Thursday was our San Diego Zoo day. I love this zoo! So many cool animals to see that our local zoo either doesn't have anymore (polar bears and hippos) or never had to begin with (Pandas and Koalas). The exhibits are amazing and you can just tell the animals are well taken care of.

This was my third time at the zoo and we actually got to see the Pandas this time. The first time we went, the line was too long. The second time we went, the exhibit was closed because there was a new Panda cub. I've seen them other places, but this time, there was no line and all the Pandas were out frolicking and eating.

A.J.'s favorites were the hippos. They were really active when we saw them, swimming around and playing with each other. We had to wait a few minutes to see the polar bears, but it was worth it when they came out and started eating and walking around. And of course, who doesn't love the Koalas. We even got to see a mommy and her little joey.

Here's some fun pictures from our day:

Just monkeying around

We warned A.J. to never smile at a crocodile.

It was a great day, with great weather and our feet weren't too worse for the wear. We went back to the hotel to swim and hang out and get to bed early to be ready for another day of adventure.

Come On Let Me Take You on a Habor Cruise

Friday was all about the San Diego Harbor and Beach.

We started the day on the USS Midway, a decommissioned air craft carrier that has been turned into a museum. This was all for James who loves military history. It was very interesting though and A.J. enjoyed it too. The tour goes through the bunking quarters to see how the sailors lived when they were on board. Can't believe how little *personal* space there is on such a big ship.

We took our turn being locked up in the brig:

A.J. took a turn in the *Boss* chair in the air traffic control center of the tour:



And a turn at the wheel: The hanger and the flight deck also have a few dozen aircraft. Of course, A.J. and James both loved that part. Here's A.J., ready for take off:

Next, it was on to the Harbor Cruise. Last time James and I visited San Diego, this was the favorite part of our trip. We took the two hour cruise that features both the North Bay and the South Bay. I love the North Bay with it's views of Downtown and Shelter Island and Point Loma. James loves the South Bay with it's views of the ship yards and Coronado. We also saw sea lions, lots of birds and several different airplanes and helicopters taking off from the US Naval airbase. A.J. thought the whole thing was great until we didn't get off the boat after the first half. Here we are at the front of the boat headed out toward Shelter Island:The USS Tarawa was coming into port while we were out on the cruise. We got to see it come all the way from the entrance to the bay, all the way down to where it went into the pier. We even got to see a Navy patrol boat push a sail boat out of the way that got too close to the ship. Here's James checking out the Tarawa.


After the Harbor Cruise, we went back to our hotel and walked to Belmont Park -- an old fashioned amusement park right at Mission Beach. We rode the old fashioned wooden roller coaster a couple of times and the bumper cars a few times. But A.J.'s favorite ride was this one that went up and down randomly called the vertical plunge:

They really made what out of Legos?

The last day of our trip was spent at Legoland. We had heard a lot of mixed reviews of this place. We put it on and off our agenda several times but in the end we went. No regrets from me. I think A.J. might have liked it better than Disneyland.

I felt like I was at a serious disadvantage here, because I know how to do Disneyland. I know what rides to hit first thing in the morning (before the crowds) and I know what is just not worth waiting in any line for. Not so at Legoland. It's all new and no one has written an "unofficial guide" yet. But we did our best. We started out the day going to the right (because I'd heard most people go to the left first).

The best ride there is the Technic Coaster -- a great little coaster that is tame enough that A.J. didn't hide, but with a bit of a "wild mouse" flavor to it. The worst ride was Treasure Falls -- a log flume ride that was too short, too wimpy and too slow loading. Of course, the degree to which we liked these rides is almost directly propotionate to how long we spent in line waiting for them. We hit the coaster first and walked straight on. We hit the Log Flume ride around noon and waited 45 minutes for a 30 second ride. When I saw the sign that said it would be 45 minutes from this point, I thought it couldn't be possible. You could see the loading point for the ride and it wasn't that far from the end. But it's about the slowest loading ride I have ever seen!

But my most favorite part of the day was running into (well, actually she ran into me) my *old* friend Ali Paxton (or as I like to call her, my friend formally known as Alice-Marie) who was also in Legoland with her family. We were waiting in line for the Knight's Joust and I heard this "Excuse me, can I get up there with my family." I knew that voice sounded too familiar and her kids looked familiar to me too. How ironic. We grew up together in Martinez and now we both live in the general Salt Lake area, but we had to go to Southern Cali to run into eachother. I wish I had thought to take a picture.

The thing that I loved the most about the park though was Miniland USA. I wasn't prepared for how much I would love to see some of USA's great cities and landmarks made entirely out of Legos. New York, San Francisco, Washington D.C., Las Vegas etc. I just couldn't stop taking pictures of all the little buildings and all the details put into them. Here's my beloved San Fran:

Over all, I would recommend Legoland to anyone with little kids who have had any exposure to Legos. The rides are geared for younger kids (very little for the true thrill seeker) and there are lots of places to get really wet if that is on your agenda. Here are some more pictures:
A.J. fighting Lego Darth Vadar with a Lego light saber with Lego R2D2 standing watch.

A.J. and James with Lego Indy.

One of many water themed areas of the park.


A.J. got eaten by a Lego Lion!

We stayed the last night in Santa Ana, very near the John Wayne Airport. Not fun to have to move again, but we still had to get up before 6:00 a.m. to make our flight this morning and any earlier might not have been worth going to bed for. It's good to be home though. We have lots to do this week!